The year 2019 was a big year for our family. Whether it was each one of us growing independantly or improving together as a family, it was certainly a year of growth. We also learned to understand our limits in different situations and when it was time to step back and take a break. Regardless there was a lot to celebrate in 2019:
Nicholas and Daniel’s friendship — This is probably our biggest celebration this year. Daniel has been wanting to be Nicholas’s friend for a long time, but Nicholas never gave him the light of day. I wrote something in July for Daniel’s 3rd birthday about how Nicholas will eventually come around. I thought it was going to be something we’d have to work on in the new year. But a month later after both of them were in school for a while, Nicholas started coming around. It started with Daniel wanting to make Nicholas laugh. Daniel really enjoyed that and Nicholas always wanted more. I don’t know if it was the socialization of being in school or that they were away from each other part of the day, but a true friendship formed.
Nicholas tolerates water — I used to give Nicholas sponge baths because he did not like water. His brother is the opposite. Daniel loves baths, playing at the splash pad, and playing with his water tower. Nicholas would watch him play on the deck with his water tower. He was curious whenever Daniel would take a bath. And finally over Labor Day weekend on the last day the splash pad was open for the season, Nicholas touched the water while my husband held him. He loved it! And now he stands at the sink and puts his hand in the water. Nicholas also gets regular baths now. I believe watching his brother helped him overcome his fears of water. He still gets a little sensitive, but not as bad as it was before.
Nicholas tolerates feeding — Feeding was one of our biggest struggles. For two years Nicholas couldn’t tolerate his feeds and would either gag, wretch, or throw up during his feedings. No matter the volume or the rate, he was never comfortable. At the beginning of the year, his feeding pump broke, so we had to wait for a new one to be delivered. I had to feed him somehow, so I fed him by syringe. It took 30 minutes and he tolerated it! A year later his feedings take less than 10 minutes. He’s tolerating it so well and actually enjoys his feeding times now.
Daniel’s independence — Daniel can walk, talk, feed himself, and mostly dress himself. I’m thankful for how independent he became this year, especially since his two siblings need so much attention. He’s learning so much in school and therapy and really likes to take charge. We try our hardest to take him out to the store or to eat whenever we can to give him the attention he deserves. He really thrives on that one-on-one time with me and my husband.
Grace was the first to crawl — Both Nicholas and Daniel went from sitting on their own, to scooting across on the floor. That’s how they got around. Of course Daniel copied from his brother. So when Grace started crawling just after her 1st birthday it was super exciting! I think it inspired Nicholas a little bit, because every once in a while I’ll catch him on his hands and knees. Grace is doing so well cruising all over the place and walking with support.
Family Growth – We did a lot of things together this year. Sometimes it was hard, but most of the time it left us with wonderful memories. We went to the mountains three times for overnight trips. We went to our first movie as a family. We’ve been going to church together without extra help. We bought a wagon to make going places easier. We’re able to go to a fast food restaurant without any meltdowns. I can take the kids to and from the car in one trip. We are so much stronger as a family.
Our Marriage is Solid — Steve and I worked hard on our marriage this year. After giving our attention to our kids and their needs for 4 years, it was time to put our marriage first. I bought a date jar for Valentine’s Day that had 52 ideas in it. We certainly couldn’t go on a date once a week, but we did a lot of cool things. We went to a comedy show, saw a ventriloquist that also sings, did a painting class together, went to a live Q&A with John Cusask, and a host of other things. We also went to L.A. for our five year anniversary. Our marriage is stronger than ever.
I’m excited to see where the year 2020 takes us. I’m hoping someone (anyone) can successfully potty train. I want Nicholas to wear his glasses full time. And I really pray that both Nicholas and Grace will walk independently by next year.